1.Do Not talk badly, put down, or call my other parent bad names.

This makes me feel torn apart and puts me down too.

 

2.Do Not talk about money, child support, or adult matters.

This makes me feel like I have to “fix it”, or that I’m just a possession.

 

3.Do not make me feel bad when I have fun with my other parent.

This makes me afraid to tell you things.

 

4.Do not argue in front of me or on the phone where I can hear you.

This makes me feel the worst kind of anxiety and that the argument is my fault.

 

5.Do not ask me to spy on my other parent or give them notes.

This makes me feel I am being dishonest and puts me in a loyalty bind.  

 

6. Do not pressure me to love you more.

I love you both even though I may be mad at one of you. 

 

7.Do Not ask me to take sides.

This makes me feel extreme anxiety and torn apart in the worst way.

 

8. Do Not ask me to ignore my other parent at school functions or extra curricular activities.

This makes me feel I’m betraying them.

 

9.Do Not let me hear you blame my other parent for the divorce.

I may feel like I must defend them, or I may feel sorry for you, which is not my job. 

 

10.DO not  tell me how to behave at my other parent’s house.

This makes me feel caught in the middle, also.